Splintered

smth_blue @ 2009-11-12T21:05:00

2009-11-12T19:13:54Z

Posting misc fandoms art as I am going away for two weeks and wanna share now :)

To get the 1280x800, click preview, Flickr page opens. Above the preview on this page there is a magnifier button All Sizes. Click it to get the big size :)

SPN, Dean/Castiel:

Dean/Castiel, Sam, for prompt: SPN/Dexter: I'd really actually like this from Dexter!Sam's pov as he watches Deb!Dean and FBI Special Agent Lundy!Cas work together to bring down the Bay Harbor Butcher or maybe this season of Dexter's new big bad.

Castiel:

Dexter fanart:

Dru wall:

Spuffy:

SPN wallpapers

2009-11-04T17:42:47Z

Wallpapers with Sam %) Feedback is love :)

To get the 1280x800, click preview, Flickr page opens. Above the preview on this page there is a magnifier button All Sizes. Click it to get the big size :)

Sam:

Sam/Ruby:

Sam/Meg:

More Sam )

Sam and Castiel, spoilers for 5.06:

Sam/Jax (Supernatural/Sons of Anarchy xover):

FNL fanart

2009-10-22T19:23:58Z

Friday Night Lights is almost here, it should start less than in a week I think.
I am struggling with autumn depression and rewatching season two ))) So here goes my greyish FNL fanart )

Destiel fanart

2009-10-18T20:12:27Z

It's that time again, me sailing the ship )

Angsty destiel %)

Castiel wall:

Episodic for 5.02:

Episodic for 5.03:

And wallscroll for 5.04:

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Very rough lyrics translation:

Let's love each other
They'll shoot us tomorrow
Don't try to understand why
Don't try to find out what for
We'll slip on the night moisture
And on slippery shadows flashing
Shedding disturbing trace
On the golden spot

Nothing's left from the Holy Ground
For us
But the very last love
And the golden spot

Stand, stand in the doorway
Like a copper statue
Like a broze crucifix
Stand in the doorway

Whedonverse fanart

2009-10-14T17:59:18Z

Special for sergi0 %)) River wallpaper:

Lyrics translation: she always left through the window.

Spuffy wall (repost)):

Lyrics translation: I couldn't have lived any place else And loved anyone like I loved you.

Buffy and Faith:

Dru as Ophelia:

Buffy:

Doctor Horrible wallpaper:

Wallpapers with Sam

2009-10-08T17:51:29Z

It's Sam Winchester time :)

And, feedback is love :)

Wallpaper I made for russian fic by Tenki:

Ruby/Sam wallpaper:

5.01 episodic:

5.02:

5.03:

5.04:

Dollhouse fanart

2009-10-07T18:15:38Z

Ok, here goes Whedonverse art. I mean Dollhouse :)

Spoilers: for first season only, none for the current one

Echo, first episode:

Echo, second episode:

Echo, fourth episode:

Sonders and Topher from the final:

Echo and Alpha from the final:

Sonders and Alpha:

Echo from the final:

Whiskey from unaired final:

smth_blue @ 2009-10-07T11:08:00

2009-10-07T08:28:33Z

Title: Milestones of His Road
Author: smth_blue
Beta: faye_dartmouth (big thanks!)
Rating: G
Character and/or Pairing: Sam Winchester
Spoilers: none for season five
Warnings: none
Word Count: 2097
Summary: All that happened with Sam through four seasons, Sam's POV. Or probably mine, it's hard to tell at this point ) But I had to get it out of my system.
Author's notes:: feedback is needed like air. Seriously. See, I didn't even put a smiley here )

The first milestone of Sam’s life was set long before the boy was born. It happened next to the old car on the side road. A girl who would become Sam’s mother was clenching her beloved one. Her hands were covered in blood. It was dark. She made a deal with the demon. And so Sam's story began.

Sammy had a home once. You know, a real one – with a warm, safe crib and cute little mobile above his head. He was lying there, smiling to the face of a man who looked like his father. The man cut his hand and drops of blood dripped right into Sam’s mouth. Blood was warm and felt ok, just like warm bottles he sometimes got at night. But warmth turned into red and orange, hot and angry, and Dean was running as fast as he could, carrying out his baby brother. The next milestone was set.

After that, everything just felt wrong. There was no home, no mom, no warmth. One motel room after another; Sam grew fast. Dean tried the best he could. Sam clung to his older brother, he kept looking out of the motel window and asking him questions. Until one day it occurred to him that probably even Dean didn’t know the truth about what was going on the other side of the glass.

Dad said that the outside world was evil and full with monsters. He was determined to keep Sam alive so he gave him shotgun. It meant that Sam was supposed to feel right because he was armed and knew the truth about monsters.

It didn't help. There were books, and movies, and people. You know, normal ones, who never had shotguns. They looked like they had homes and knew why and how to live. All Sam’s family knew was how to survive. Sam guessed there was the difference when he was quite young.

He wanted to feel right. He strived for normal. He looked around, and there were two possibilities: either the world was crazy and blind, or his family was. But the world looked great and happy to the younger Winchester. The world seemed content with itself. It looked like the world knew or had something Winchester family didn’t, some critical ingredient, a missing part, something crucial for Sam Winchester. So when Sam’s teacher asked him what he wanted to do, he realized he needed to find that missing part. Not to fight, not to shoot. He wanted to have a home. He wanted to be safe. So he closed the door into the face of his angry father and never looked back.

Jessica was amazing. She let Sam into her house and her heart, she felt right in his arms. She smelled like home and she saw Sam for who he was. Eating cookies before breakfast, Sam realized that he wanted to marry her. Sam Winchester decided that he found his missing part.

That night, he had his first nightmare. Jessica was burning on the ceiling; Sam was screaming beneath her. The world had a wicked way of treating the hidden outcasts, hadn’t it? He woke up all sweaty and nauseous. There was blood in his mouth – he bit his lip. Blood tasted like coins – crude and raw. He never remembered the warm taste from that orange night – he grew up a long time ago.

And, he grew up with things like ghosts and vampires. He was trained to fight monsters. He didn’t believe in spooky dreams. It was just a mind trick. Or he just shouldn’t eat cookies before sleep. A reasonable explanation, a simple illusion. Jessica was real – she breathed peacefully next to him. The dream disappeared the moment Sam opened his eyes. That was what he tried to do – live with his eyes open. No nightmares could change that.

But his brother got into his life through a backdoor one night to drink a bottle of beer and ask him to hit the road. Sam should have known there was no way back the moment he set his foot on the dusty road. He didn’t though. He had been naïve. His new life folded like a house of cards and burnt in flames. How could he left Jessica unprotected? The most important things in life – like love and home - are the easiest to lose.

Sam looked at the ashes of the home he had found and lost. He didn’t have strength to start over. All that fueled him to continue was pure rage and memory that he had felt right once and then it had been taken from him. He was back on the road again. Hunt, shoot, sleep; one surreal motel after another, his brother keeping him company, keeping him sane.

One day after Jessica’s death. One week after Jessica’s death. Taste of another woman was like the taste of life – fresh and warm. But the road kept him firmly tangled in the noose, tagging and pulling to follow demon’s track – it wasn’t safe yet.

Nightmares were real. Inside him there was a freak. But Sam had enough strength to fight his inner demons just as he did on the hunt.

One year after Jessica’s death. Eternity of running in circles.

Dean was breaking the windshield of his beloved Impala. It was Sam’s turn to keep his brother sane. He tried the best he could to ease his brother’s pain. He also tried to shut down his own cry of guilt by following his father’s footsteps. It was too late for his father, yet it wasn’t too late to be there for Dean. He still hated the road and believed he could be free one day, not trapped in that strange life of peek-a-boo with ghosts of his past and monsters of his present. He needed balance.

He went to the church and there it was – white, pure, balancing light. They weren’t alone on the dark road, they had a purpose – a bigger, a greater one than counting crows on the graves and burning bones of beloved ones. He must have known from the very beginning that it was no angel but just another lie.

Life went back to normal, chaos cut by one endless road, and the hunt continued. Then he met Madison. He fell for her at once. No, she was nothing like Jessica and it wasn’t about home or that missing part anymore. She was full of wild life, desperate to keep her blood pumping but under control. He felt vibration coming from every move of hers; it was like clawing into wet ground not to fall off the cliff. Sam was standing at that cliff, too. It started with him wanting to keep Dean sane. It turned into Dean holding him on the edge of the high rock. Sam looked at Madison, a wild call in his eyes, and she replied. They could claw into each other, and it felt good. But the wild got out of hand. Madison’s hands were trembling when she reached to Sam with a gun and asked him to kill a monster. He closed his eyes… Dean was holding a gun. Dean cared about his brother. Since that day, Sam hated full moon.

There was no saving but hunting. There was no home but the road. And the road liked to bumped into crossroads, like commas in the middle of sentences – pause here. Did you still want to continue? Demon laughed and cringed: “Make a full stop, made a wish.” That milestone they set with Dean. Look back, Winchester brothers: that was the wrong crossroad to pause at.

Sam always believed in himself no matter what happened. He was… what did they call it? Special? Chosen? Not the one to be killed. He could fight his freakish side. He was strong. He looked at his mother dying on the ceiling. Blood was his milk, rage was his strength. He believed he would win right until the moment knife sank in his back.

When he returned, he shot his killer. Nothing changed: revenge was still the best fuel.

Sam looked at his brother. Sam didn’t break. Sam didn’t hit Dean or retreat into himself. Didn’t talk either. He fought. He believed he could keep Dean alive. He had to believe.

And then they met trickster. Sam didn’t count how many times he saw Dean dying. One morning, he woke up and went on the hunt. Months passed without communication with the outside world. Life turned into one small focus: find the way out. You could stop that. You could break from that home-made hell. It was all on Sam to rewind the old tape with that nightmare and break free. Reality depended on him. He succeeded.

And then he didn’t. Hell hounds tracked them down. He buried Dean.

He never buried Dean before. The only thing that kept him sane when he shoved ground on black coffin, was the thought that he had already rewound that tape. He could do that again.

When Sam returned to that crossroad, he was drunk. There were many reasons for that all tangled in a tight knot of snakes inside his chest: love, despair, guilt, responsibility. Failure.

On the one hand, he had to come here much sooner, for Dean not to suffer that long in Hell. Sam tried not to imagine what it was like down there, because he couldn’t afford to fall apart. One last effort to save Dean and he would feel on his own skin what was hidden under his feet, and the road would finally end. It would have ended sooner, but Sam had so many reasons not to come to that damned crossroad. He knew what it would be like for Dean to go on living after digging a hole for his baby brother. After dad. Crossroad demons knew how to set a trap, they got them all, one after another, whole Winchester family trading souls. For what? For love? Was it love to make each other suffer by forcing them live again and again? Over a year Sam struggled to make sense of his existence. Love didn’t make sense to him at all.

And where was he? On the crossroad. He failed yet again. No demon needed his soul of a freak. A monster? Half-blood demon? Still a Winchester. The only Winchester who failed to trade his soul. Had been cursed or something. Sam drank some more.

Splitting headaches made him wake up in the mornings. If it weren’t for them, he would sleep himself to death. And there was also Ruby offering some consolation. She offered him sex and a purpose – revenge. Something to look forward to. He loved Ruby that night because she made perfect sense. There was a click in Sam’s brain and he saw the purpose clearly. So what if he was a freak? He still could make some good with that darker part of his. She whispered “Let yourself go” and that wasn’t an issue: all what that Sam was afraid was that there was nothing left of him after Dean’s death. An empty shell. Feel her body, touch her throat, she wanted him to drink her dry. Taste of demon blood was familiar, he drank it before, right?

Still, it was hard at first to shut down all his previous beliefs and knowledge, to fight his own disgust. Those were weaknesses he couldn’t afford. Technically, he wasn’t even human and he had nothing to lose. Let yourself go, be yourself to stop being you. Made perfect sense at that time. Ruby smiled because he was getting stronger.

And then Dean came back. Angels existed! They were the heroes, the warriors of God. Angels would help them to make everything right. Sam hoped that angels would understand all his best intentions to hunt the evil on the Earth.

He also believed he had the right to go on living. He read the Bible and prayed every night. There was forgiveness waiting for him and Dean at the end. Whatever Dean had done at the Pit, everything would be forgiven. Angels were walking Earth, faith was tangling in his chest. Sam felt joy first time for many days. He didn’t sleep that night – he thought about order in the chaos. He saw the end of their road, and there was light.

It was one last milestone, one that had been set for him since the day his mother made the deal, and it is his to fail and succeed at, until the end of time.

The end

Castiel wallpapers

2009-09-18T18:20:21Z

Ok, Castiel wallpapers :)

Destiel wall I made for fun ) (Supernatural/Harry Potter xover)

Angsty Dean/Castiel:

Jimmy wallpaper.

I think it requires some explanation:

It's probably one of the darkest pages in Castiel story we've seen so far. Jimmy had faith, but after letting an angel into his body he lost it, he's got broken in this big war for angels' Big Plan. I don't believe that he has Castiel's wings but Castiel does have his body in his full possession. What helps Jimmy keep going is his love not to Heaven but to his daughter. If he hadn't agree to host Castiel again he knew that she would have suffered as he had so now Jimmy's soul is trapped somewhere inside. It's his eternal prison where Heaven holds him hostage for his soul never to get to Heaven – caught butterfly on a pin. Actually, it's worse that Heaven because for him even Habeas Corpus - You (shall) have the body, a legal action, through which a person can seek relief from the unlawful detention of him or herself, or of another person and which safeguards individual freedom – doesn't work anymore. I've added autumn leaves because of Jimmy being wounded and felling down and I just love that you call autumn fall in English )) It also symbolizes the downtime for the Heaven.

Castiel:

From the moment I've noticed harp in that Green Room of angels, it bugged me as Hell coz everything had to have meaning and I didn't understand what the harp meaning was for the situation. And then I realized that in some poetry – particular in Tomas Moore's – harp is referred as a symbol of rebellion and finally made peace with myself ) So, the quote is from Dear Harp of my Country by Thomas Moore. There, the author is freeing a harp voice to sing the truth. Castiel bounded by orders, finally freed his voice. So, harp symbolizes his free will here %)

And the one I made for Olga's birthday :)

smth_blue @ 2009-09-05T21:32:00

2009-09-05T18:57:58Z

Some Sam's wallpapers before the season starts :)

Two walls I made for the great fic by faye_dartmouth written for summer_sam_love
(I have some LJ issues - can't link properly so here's link to the fic:
http://community.livejournal.com/summer_sam_love/5882.html

Sam/Meg:

Episodic:

396live

2009-08-29T20:01:44Z

396live
Originally uploaded by Smth_Blue

Testing

smth_blue @ 2009-08-03T21:07:00

2009-08-03T18:07:38Z

Castiel time :) Feedback is love %)

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Explanation for the one above:

Angels are supposed to love their heavenly Father and follow His will. So, lost God here is King Lear, Zachariah and Uriel are older daughters who spoke pretty but betrayed and Castiel is the youngest and the loyal one who tried to save his Father's creations despite other angels.

Space, and liberty – I quoted the oldest daughter. For Zachariah does go to free space on the Earth and Hell from people and demons. I guess there will be lots of ground for angels to walk on...

An enemy to all other joys – the second daughter – Uriel did despise people considering angels higher beings.

And the youngest Castiel who does speak little but acts the bravest )

Inspired by Je suis venu comme j'avais promis, I came as I've promised by French surrealist Yves Tanguy.

The moment I looked at the painting, I knew that it is about an angel who came to save the Earth. He is also holding a fish under his wing so the Christianity springs to mind at once. So I think I followed the general concept of the piece, the composition, and I think the coloring is pretty close.

Rough translation of russian lyrics:
The apostle Andrew was fishing at berth
While the Saviour walked on water
And apostle Andrew caught gudgeon
While the Saviour got out dead people.

Lyrics translation: that's how the day began ) This one was so much fun to make )))

smth_blue @ 2009-07-22T21:59:00

2009-07-22T19:20:29Z

Title: Afterthought
Author: smth_blue
Author: _jennilou
Rating: G
Genre and/or Pairing: Dean/Castiel
Spoilers: none
Warnings: none, oh but does my first!fic counts?
Word Count: 195
Summary: 5 minutes after the end of 4.22

Sam clutched at Dean’s vest as if his life depended on it and thought
that the knife dove into Ruby’s body so easily,
that Lilith’s blood had an odd smell,
and that Dean probably forgave him because he was standing next to him and holding onto Sam’s shirt. Dean standing next to him definitely meant that everything was going to be ok.

Dean gripped Sammy’s shirt holding his brother still on the pit’s edge as it grew with every second and thought
about how he had broken the first seal and he sure as hell had to be able to close the last one.
If only Zachariah hadn’t lied to him about his big destiny.
And Zachariah was a lying son of a bitch…
They had to run before it was too late. He had to lock Sammy back in the panic room, (mental note: let him keep his notebook this time) and then they would figure out how to deal with that Apocalypse crap.

Archangel blew slightly for a sleeping Chuck to appear on his sofa and turned back to Castiel.
Castiel closed his eyes and still had time to think:
“Dean.”

FIN

smth_blue @ 2009-07-20T21:11:00

2009-07-20T18:32:36Z

It was Jared's birthday yesterday, so I made a birthday postcard :)

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And seven Sam's wallpapers :)

Two Sam/Meg (yes, I am weird this way )):

Lyrics translation: I guess you paint your face with vicious paint on purpose (Picnic).

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Nowhere to go
Dirty roads are
All what's left for us (Yanka Dyagileva)

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Sam/Ruby:

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Two episodic ones:

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Rough translation (OMG, I have no idea why I made so many walls with russian lyrics this time!):
Trough invisible fence
I am talking to someone about something
I know that faith is my erogenous zone (Picnic)

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The one I made for spnspaincon:

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Plus one xover with Sons of Anarchy, Sam/Jax ):

smth_blue @ 2009-06-05T20:20:00

2009-06-05T17:33:58Z

Some Dean/Castiel art :) Feedback is love :)

First, wallscroll we made together with Zugma aka uglybusiness , up to 4.21 :)

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And some Dean/Castiel moments I couldn't help to picture )

From 4.16 up to the final:

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From 4.19, because we know that Castiel was there )))

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And a random for 4.01:

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Rough translation of lyrics:

Two steps apart
But before that day
I never knew what fire is
And that you were made of/came from fire

smth_blue @ 2009-05-03T21:13:00

2009-05-03T18:14:00Z

It was Sam's birthday yesterday so i am bearing lots of the birthday boy walls from season four :)

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smth_blue @ 2009-04-17T23:27:00

2009-04-17T20:43:52Z

I am back and I am in love with Dean/Castiel ship :)

Spoilers for On the head of a Pin
Explanation: a short one :)
I love the scene. Actually, Alastar was supposed to be here, he needs to be here, and he kinda is - it's his blood connecting/separating Dean and Cas. Also, Dean is a knife and Cas is a holly water :)

That was my very first wall with Castiel :)

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Dean with wings. I didn't planned these two walls to be mirrored but they are. It's fate :)

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Plus one more Dean/Castiel wall. This one was made after i've read lots of heated discussions about which fandom ship has more rights to exist :)))
:

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SPN art

2009-03-20T12:36:34Z

I haven't posted here forever. I am kinda between styles right now, I don't know if it's worth sharing, just experimenting mixing new and old and would really appreciate your feedback on these :)

Pam and Cas:

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Sam and Dean:

Dean I made as thanks to Olga :)

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Multifandom wallpapers

2008-08-17T20:03:34Z

So, i have a bunch of old wallpapers i did when i was away from LJ and thus never posted here. I thought i'd share :)

Feedback is love :)

Dru wallpaper:

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Prison Break wallpaper:

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Eureka wallpaper:

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BtVS/Supernatural xover:

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House/Chase:

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Spike wall:

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Deb wall:

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River:

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Credits

smth_blue @ 2008-08-14T09:02:00

2008-08-14T06:14:06Z

Please let me present you my new obsession - Friday Night Lights %)
Please do not alter. Feedback makes me happy :)

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Credits

SPN art

2008-08-11T21:05:53Z

I haven't posted anything for a year! That's scary...
Some Supernatural art, i think i'll post second part a bit later.
Please do not alter. Feedback makes me happy :)

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Credits

smth_blue @ 2007-08-20T18:45:00

2007-08-20T15:46:23Z

I haven't set a foot here for too long, so my appologies... Well, 8 multifandom wallpapers as amends and i decided to include HP art coz i don't do it that much as i used to :)

Please do not alter. Feedback makes me happy :)

Supernatural (i'll post more soon):

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James Marsters:

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Nip Tuck:

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Eureka:

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Tudors:

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Draco/Hermione:

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Nikki/Peter:

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And Peter:

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Credits

New fanart

2007-07-13T09:00:51Z

I will be on vacation in 6 hours! Happy me :) Some art before i am not here %))

Please do not alter. Feedback makes me happy :)

The Tudors:

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Crazy Xover Birthday card for my friend Ira:

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Dean Whinchester from Crossroad Blues:

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Sam/Meg:

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Dick Casablanca:

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Dru wallpaper:

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Credits

Supernatural art for spn_j2_bigbang

2007-06-25T19:15:42Z

To the lovable fic by thelonejuliet Please go and read it! :)

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HP art

2007-06-14T06:23:57Z

New HP art :)

Please do not alter. Feedback makes me happy :)

OoP, Golden Trio:

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Sirius Black:

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Tonks:

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Fleur:

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Credits